Yearly Archives: 2017

A large part of facilitating groups is helping them to get to know each other and thus I collect questions to use as openers. However, I have found that I have a handful that I return to over and over.

Here are my top 4 Get to Know You Questions: 

1. “What are you reading or listening to?” If asked for clarification, this could include books, magazines, podcasts, audio books, or music. I personally am often looking for books or podcasts. Even if the conversation doesn’t go well hopefully I walk away with a book or podcast to check out! Many of the groups I attend have business leaders who are constantly learning and thus this is not often hard for them to answer and typically leads to interesting conversations. If someone asks this question to the group at the start, I find that I often want to go ask quite a few people more questions later because their book choices pique my interest. For groups that may be less likely to read as often, I have changed it up to say “What was the last thing you read or listened to?”
2. “What group or activity are you involved in?” This is especially helpful when I facilitate something that brings in a variety of organizations where people may not want to be associated with their day job, but they do want you to know that they volunteer with a specific group. I find this is often a really good way to know what people are passionate about enough to tell you what their time goes to.
3. “Why did you attend this event today?” This is used really often so I sometimes get bored with it, but for many events it helps to show what connection the individuals there have to the event as well as gets to what they want (which if you have spent much time around me, you know I think is knowing what other partners want is essential to collaboration).
4. “What other events, meetups, or conferences do you like to attend?” This is an opener, but I personally like it because it tells me what other events are out there and I can get feedback from someone who has attended the event. Sometimes I will also ask something similar like “What is the best conference you have ever attended?” This can be especially helpful when you are trying to find events someone with similar interests will attend.

If you follow me, you probably know that I believe relationships are crucial to your success. However I admit, that doesn’t mean I love networking events. I want valuable authentic relationships, and a quick chat and business card swap doesn’t cut it.

So how do you turn this business card swap into something of legitimate value?

1. MINDSET MATTERS!  Why are you attending this event? If you show up with a mindset of trying to sell your thing, it likely won’t go as well for you. If you approach it with the mindset that this is an opportunity to start cultivating relationships, it will likely play out better. The thing with relationships is that they often take a bit more work than swapping a business card. This is just your first connection. Your goal should be to connect further.
2. ALWAYS OFFER VALUE! Give first. Look for ways to offer value when you connect with someone. Did they mention a project they are working on or something that they are trying to figure out? Do you have resources you can share on this topic? Perhaps a link to a Ted Talk or an article you can email. Make note of these during the conversation so you have something of value to follow up on. Look for ways you can help them at no cost.
3. CONNECT ON SOCIAL MEDIA! One of the first things I do with that stack of business cards is look up connections and then like their business facebook page, connect on linkedin, follow on twitter and instagram, and subscribe on youtube. Fun tip- a great way to follow up is simply liking their posts, retweeting, and commenting on social media. Some of us get so caught up in our number of followers we forget, that we learn a lot about the people around us by following them on social media. I am not suggesting you be inauthentic and like things you don’t legitimately like, but by following them you have the opportunity to see what they share. This allows you the chance to deepen your connection and when you see something you do like, take the second to let them know!
4. EMAIL FOLLOW UP! This can be very simple. Just a quick email stating it was nice to connect. This is a great time to share resources that you can offer them such as links to a book, ted talk, or article you recommend. If you have something further you want to discuss with them, this can be a great time to suggest meeting for coffee or further connection. Additionally, I love to use these emails to further conversations on mutual interest. We both discussed an interest in connecting with others and this person seems to go to a lot of events, maybe ask that they let you know about fun events they see coming up.